18

Nov

Facing Rejection

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jeff

change agent, change leader, change management, PMO, rejection, resistance, transformation

Be a better team member, Change, Communicate, How to fix teams, Personal Development, Right Words to Say

It’s incredibly frustrating to join a company as an agent of change only to be rejected by the people who need your help. Here are 8 strategies to use when resistance to change is directed at you.

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11

Nov

One word that will make change easier for you

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jeff

change, change management, coping, organizational change, resistance, stress, stress management, transformation

Be a better team member, Connect, Exercises, Personal Development, Right Words to Say

The difference between feeling in control of changes at work or feeling the victim is how you frame it. “I have to” or “I choose to.”

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14

Oct

How do you deal with someone who is always negative about change?

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3coze

change, change management, complainer, complaining, feedback, negativity, passive-aggressive, transformation, transition

Be a better team member, Communicate, conflict, Connect, How to fix teams, Right Words to Say

So, you’re busy trying to get on with the next in line of never-ending changes in your organization but you’ve got THAT person on your team: The person who moans and complains at every request and drones on about how horrible everything is. First of all, I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Second, […]

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30

Sep

Should I be honest with my colleagues?

1 comment

3coze

candor, feedback, honesty, performance review, radical candor, resesarch, teamwork, truth

Be a better team member, conflict, Connect, How to fix teams

This just in: new research on the effects of being honest and what it means for you. I’m constantly encouraging people to engage in the productive conflict that will move their team (and their organization) forward. The biggest stumbling block is people’s fear that being honest about what they think and feel will erode trust […]

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10

Jun

How to Deal with a Defensive Person

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3coze

backlash, coworker, defensive, defensiveness, development, dysfunction, feedback

Be a better team member, Communicate, Right Words to Say

Defensive people are the WORST! It drives me nuts when I give even the most minor piece of feedback and the person on the other end gets all hot under the collar and ignores every word I said. Grow up, people. You’re not perfect and pretending that you are is making you insufferable. Seriously! That’s […]

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20

May

Should you pick your battles?

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3coze

argument, battles, colleagues, conflict, debates, fights, passive-aggressive, war metaphors

About teams, Be a better team member, Communicate, conflict, How to fix teams, Personal Development, Right Words to Say

“Do you agree that we should pick our battles?” This was a question I got during the Q&A session of a keynote speech I gave last week. I think I surprised the questioner with my response, which means I might surprise you too, so here goes. If you are “picking battles,” you’re getting conflict all […]

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13

May

How to deal with a down in the dumps coworker

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3coze

commiserate, commiseration, disappointment, downer, gossip, problem solve, validate, venting

Be a better team member, Communicate, Connect, Right Words to Say

Your colleague is having a bad day (or week, or life). She grabs the empty chair from beside your desk, rolls it over and flops down, legs spread, head back, arms dangling—defeated. She proceeds to unload her troubles on you. You get all the gory details. Once the story is complete, she looks you in […]

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18

Feb

How to Get People To Live Up to Your Expectations

1 comment

3coze

accountability, alignment, communication, communication breakdown, expectations, goal setting, goals

About teams, Be a better team leader, Be a better team member, Connect, Right Words to Say

We got talking about expectations in a session I was facilitating last week. The conversation was like a giant projective test; quickly exposing the participants’ core ideologies about people, and relationships, and trust. Some of the people around the table talked about the power of the self-fulfilling prophecy and how setting lofty goals can inspire […]

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04

Feb

How to Cope with Backlash to Your Feedback

7 comments

3coze

defensive coworker, defensive teammate, defensiveness, emotional, feedback, performance management, resistance

About teams, Be a better team leader, Be a better team member, Communicate, Contribute, Personal Development, Right Words to Say

I facilitated a workshop this week that has given me lots of juicy fodder for discussion here with you. The session focused on uncomfortable discussions, including considerable time on how to give and to receive feedback. The conversation evolved as it usually does: we started with the mechanics of how to give feedback and quickly […]

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28

Jan

How to Broach an Uncomfortable Topic

3 comments

3coze

argument, communication, conflict, conflict resolution, disagree with teammates, disagreement

Be a better team member, Communicate, conflict, Connect, How to fix teams, Right Words to Say

I keep encouraging you to wade into uncomfortable conversations as they emerge to avoid racking up conflict debt. Rather than deferring the topic, or talking only with those who agree with you, it’s best to get the disagreement out in the open. When you do, the point is to find a way to get on […]

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