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Posts Tagged ‘defensiveness

10
Jun

Defensive people are the WORST! It drives me nuts when I give even the most minor piece of feedback and the person on the other end gets all hot under the collar and ignores every word I said. Grow up, people. You’re not perfect and pretending that you are is making you insufferable. Seriously! That’s […]

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04
Feb

I facilitated a workshop this week that has given me lots of juicy fodder for discussion here with you. The session focused on uncomfortable discussions, including considerable time on how to give and to receive feedback. The conversation evolved as it usually does: we started with the mechanics of how to give feedback and quickly […]

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31
Jan

I recently debuted a new speech about building high performance teams. My ideas about how to build a high performance team (and whether teams even have the courage that high performance requires) are getting crisper…and edgier. I’ll share some of those ideas on the blog in the near future. One audience member was undeterred by […]

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31
May

  I was preparing to facilitate a day-long meeting for a new team leader.  He had just joined the organization and was pulling together the team of direct reports he had inherited.  As we discussed his objectives for the day, he mentioned that what he really wanted was “juicy discussions.” By “juicy discussions” he meant […]

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14
Apr

One of the most difficult and demoralizing workplace situations to endure is when someone criticizes you in front of your whole team. Each of us responds slightly differently to that situation: how you react will depend on your self-confidence, your physical state at the time (e.g., are you tired, anxious, or angry), and the cultural norms […]

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23
Mar

If you’re like me, you have days when you feel like it’s a constant uphill battle; like you’re doing you’re very best but it just doesn’t seem to be good enough.  On those days, even the best intentioned feedback can trigger a defensive reaction.  It’s not a good thing, but you know it’s going to […]

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10
Nov

Why did you do it that way? Why did you talk to her before talking to me? Why did you promise the customer that we would get it to them? Why didn’t you do a better job? Why is your nose so big? Why? Why? Why? Annoyed yet? And I’m not even your teammate…or worse, […]

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